Reasons
by Starlight Warrior 1092
Summary: 10 stories to tell, 10 lives now forgotten. 10 moments of joy or sorrow to relive once more. 10 reasons to return. For Shannon Silver's 10 Oneshot Challenge. Will I complete this chellenge? I think I will!
1. The Cat With Strange Eyes

**Well, I have decided that I want to take Shannon Silver's 10 oneshot challenge. Even though Shannon kinda... deleted it... and changed it to a 100 oneshot challenge... heh heh ^^'. I would love to do the '10' oneshot challenge instead, since I saved the themes onto my computer.**

**Also, I want to tell fans of mine (who may or may not be reading this) that I might post a new story... "Words From The Stars, Bird of Flames". It's many seasons after Sandstar has died, but she is in the prologue! Just wanted to say... hopefully before summer's over I'll have that up.**

**Wow. Long author's note over... I don't own Warriors.**

**The Cat With Strange Eyes**

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Why does everyone have to judge each other before even getting to know them? Why can't we all just get along? Just because you're from one clan doesn't make you fox-hearted, or better than everyone else or anything. It just means that you happened to be born in that clan. So, when someone like me was born... _different_, does that mean that I'm bad? Does that mean that I'm _weird_, or messed up just because I'm not like everyone else? No. I am not better than anyone else, but I'm defiantly not _worse_ than them! One day, I'll show them that. One day, they'll see.

My name is Darkpaw. The day I opened my eyes, I became shunned by my clan. I did nothing wrong, I just opened my eyes one day. I thought that everyone could see like me. Did I only have one eye? No, I had two. My mother said so. But I just couldn't see out of one. It was so light blue it was almost _white_, and I couldn't see anything but darkness. But that wasn't why I was shunned.

No, it was my other eye that caused all of my problems. My _other_ eye was so dark brown that it was almost black. Our medicine cat, Owlwhisker, said that my dark eye showed the darkness that would grow in my heart. They told me that I would turn evil, so they didn't let me have any fun... ever. If I tried to leave the den, it was because I was going to murder someone, not because I needed to make dirt. If I talked about how I wanted to see outside of camp like all of the other kits, it was because I was going to go to the other clans and tell them all of out secrets.

I grew up being told how bad I was, and how I would never hurt the clan. I did everything they told me to do, but Owlwhisker said that the darkness was growing from my hatred. Maybe old Owlwhisker was right. I _did_ feel hatred.

I hated Owlwhisker. I hated my mother and father for listening to him and doing everything he told them to do. I hated my littermates for always ignoring me and treating me as if I was a fox instead of a kit. I hated how the leader _let_ Owlwhisker ruin my life.

I never got to have a life worth living. But hey, I did get to become an apprentice! And my mentor: Pineblaze. Pineblaze trusted his uncle Owlwhisker more than any other cat in the clan, so you can just _guess_ how my apprenticeship is going too far!

"Darkpaw," Pineblaze's voice was full of venom as he spat my name from his lips. "Get your butt out of the apprentice's den, we have hunting to do! Unless you want to show your darkness and let the elders starve..."

"I will _never_ let the elders starve!" I growled at him as I pulled myself out of the den, stretching. My back ached, since I didn't ever have enough moss in my nest. The bracken that always filled it was full of thorns. I looked up to Pineblaze, my dark eye meeting his forest green eyes. "I _always_ follow the warrior code. That's how I was raised."

"Then _show_ me you won't turn against us," Pineblaze hissed, his eyes two slits of anger. He acted like I had killed someone close to him, though I had never laid a claw on another cat before. "Bring back the prey for the elders. And then clean out their den, make them new nests, and check their pelts for fleas."

I nodded, trudging over towards the entrance to camp. Cats stared at me, but I knew they weren't looking at _me_. No, they were looking at my _eye_. Some of the cats called it strange, and the kits liked to call it my 'dead eye', even though it was the one that could see.

"Hey, _Deadeye_," One of the warriors snickered. "Aren't you worried that you'll be renamed _Deadeye_ when you become a warrior? Or will _Darkeye_ be enough? What about Dark_heart?_"

I ignored the snickering warriors. They got to live the life that I always wanted. You never know how good your life is until you live through my life. I turned my head, making sure that Pineblaze was following me. If no one was with me, I would be confined to camp for a _moon_. I was nearing the time where I would become a warrior, and honestly, I was scared. I didn't want to be called 'Darkeye' or 'Deadeye'. I wanted to be Nightclaw, but there was no _way_ that Redstar would rename me that.

"Darkpaw," Pineblaze growled. "Stop. I have to talk with someone before we leave."

And with that, Pineblaze raced off. I stopped and sat down, my tail flicking. Heartbeats later, I realized that someone was watching me. My eye flicked over and saw Softpaw, a small ginger she cat apprentice. Her bright blue eyes were focused on me. But when she noticed that I knew that she was watching her, she fluffed up in embarrassment. She leaped to her paws and made her way over here.

"S-sorry," Softpaw whispered. "I didn't mean to stare. I-I was just..."

"Looking at my eye?" I asked sharply, startling her.

"N-no!" She gasped. "I was looking at your pelt. It's really quite... handsome, you know." Her gaze didn't meet mine.

Handsome? Me? "Don't make me laugh," I replied dryly, my tail flicking with annoyance. I _knew_ that she had to be staring at my eyes, just because they were different.

"B-but it's true!" Softpaw squeaked, looking up into my one good eye. "Why are you always so mean to yourself? Doesn't it just prove what _they_ always say is right?"

I glared at her. In her eyes, I could see honesty. Was she really telling the truth? "I don't prove that they're right. They're treating me as if I was a _murderer_. I've never even laid a _claw_ on another cat before!" I felt tears threatening to spill, but I blinked them away. No, I wouldn't show her emotion. Nothing other than hatred. I hated everyone for treating me this way.

"I know," Softpaw whispered. "And you wouldn't lay a claw on your clan mates either, I can tell. I was just..." She trailed off, turning her head away from me. "I have to go."

She leaped to her paws and raced off as Pineblaze came back over to me.

"Did you make her cry?" Pineblaze asked. "I thought I taught you better." Then he added, "You mouse brained _monster_."

Rage boiled in my heart, but I held my tongue. I wouldn't talk back. If I did, I wouldn't leave the camp for a moon. And StarClan, was I thinking about leaving the clan! I couldn't _stand_ the way they treated me! I would be better off alone...

It had been two moons since I left the clan. I did it, I _left_. I put my past behind me, and left while Pineblaze wasn't looking. Now he thinks that I'm still out here, and he's right- I am. But Pineblaze told everyone... that I would come back and kill the kits for not getting a good enough kithood. But he was wrong. I just came back to watch over my clan.

"I'm here," I whispered from the bushes. A ginger pelt caught my eye as a she cat padded over towards the bushes that I was hiding in. Normally, I could freak out if a cat found me.

"Hello," The ginger she cat purred, her bright blue eyes on me.

"Soft_feather_," I purred, smiling at her.

Even since I left, I realized how much I missed Softpaw, now Softfeather. I had to come back- to watch over the clan I left behind and occasionally say _hi_ to a special she cat. But I decided a moon ago that this would be my last meeting with Softfeather. I couldn't stall her life any more than I already had.

"Darkpaw, where have you been the entire time?" Softfeather asked quietly.

"Here," I answered. "I... I continue to watch over my clan. I couldn't leave it entirely. But Softfeather..." I looked into her eyes, seeing the love, the hope. I would break it all. "This is the last time you will see me. I can't stall your life any more than I already have. You deserve someone, and I'm not that cat."

"I can't forget about you," Softfeather cried.

"Then don't," I answered. "When you have kits, _when_, not _if_... tell them about me. I'll continue to watch over the clan. But... Don't call me Darkpaw. I _hate_ that name..."

"Then what should I call you?" Softfeather asked.

I smiled at her. "The Cat With Strange Eyes."

Softfeather smiled and nodded. "Then, this is good bye?"

I nodded. "Live long, Softfeather. I'll be watching over you. Someday I'll see you again."

A small black and white kit looked at the small ginger pelted elder. The kit's eyes were wide with wonder.

"Softfeather, Softfeather!" The kit cried. "Tell us a story!"

Two other kits gathered around the black and white one, all of their eyes wide and pleading. Softfeather purred. It had been moons, _seasons_, since The Cat With Strange Eyes had left, but she could feel that he was still here, watching over them.

"Well, a long time ago," Softfeather began, watching the kits curl up into a pile to listen. "There was a kit that was born. He had one pale blue eye and one dark brown eye. He was blind in his blue eye, and the medicine cat told everyone that his dark eye showed his dark, evil heart."

"Evil!" One of the kits gasped.

"So this cat was hated by everyone because of his eye," Softfeather meowed. "They called him Darkkit, and then Darkpaw. Everyone made jokes about what his name would be as a warrior- Darkeye or Deadeye. But this cat had a kind heart, he was just misunderstood. He left the clan after the constant torture that they gave him."

A tear welled up in Softfeather's eyes. "He... well, you could say that we became friends. When I became a warrior, he came back. He told me that he would watch over the clan from the shadows, and make sure the kits are always safe."

"Darkpaw's still around?" A ginger kit asked.

"No," Softfeather meowed. "_Darkpaw_ isn't around anymore. He goes by a new name now. One of his nicknames."

Softfeather looked over, out of the elders den to the camp wall. She could see a pale blue eye watching her, and the slight glimmer of a darker eye next to it. She smiled. "He's now The Cat With Strange Eyes."

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**Word count: 1,813. That's over 1,000! Yay!**

**Next one: We Meet And Part**

**Review please? I would love some constructive criticism... I always try to improve my writing skills. Oh, and all of these will be first person, I think. At least the first four. Of ten. Until next time!**


	2. We Meet And Part

**Thanks for the reviews everyone! I swear I would've updated earlier! But my parents me away to Michigan (without internet) and then a surprise trip to my grandparents house on the fourth and fifth (again without internet). So I would've updated...nd I think I've been reading too many X-Men: The Movie fanfictions for my own good...**

**I do not own Warriors, nor will I ever.**

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Looking around, my eyes always seem to linger on one cat. Out of every cat in the entire clan, there's always one cat that lingers in my mind. I shouldn't be feeling the feelings that I feel right now... but I can't stop. My mind doesn't listen to my heart.

His dark ginger pelt was right there, in the middle of the crowd of cats in the middle of camp. The dark ginger of his pelt stuck out among all of the other colors. I could see him, right there, right now. But I knew something deep down inside my heart told me, he couldn't see me. He never would, though I would never admit that.

"Reedclaw," I murmured, staring at him. He didn't hear me, no one did. No one ever really cared much. But I didn't mind. I was a quiet one, everyone knew that. I was a quiet one who almost never talked much unless I _really_ wanted to.

In the first few moons I never noticed the cream colored pelt that always seemed to be lingering around Reedclaw's dark ginger pelt. There were tons of cats in my clan, so why should I worry? They'll find a mate, and I'll talk with Reedclaw. He'll fall in love with me once I can muster up the courage to talk with him.

But now I knew why there was always another pelt near Reedclaw. That cream pelt was always there, every day. Only now did I realize that she was always around him. Reedclaw said nothing about already having a mate, so I still had a chance. If only I could find the courage to tell him...

"Hey Ivyfall," Reedclaw meowed, dipping his head to me as he padded over. I smiled and nodded, sending a slight glare to the creamy she cat that followed him.

"How are you?" I asked quietly, hoping that he didn't mind me talking to him.

"Wonderful," Reedclaw answered, his gaze falling on the cream she cat. He turned back to me. "Do you want to go hunting later?"

My heart skipped a beat. H-hunting? With _Reedclaw?_ I would love to! "S-sure, that sounds nice." I silently growled at myself for being so... _quiet_ all of the time. I could do this, I could talk to him.

"Great," Reedclaw replied, padding away. He paused. "Oh, can Petalfern come to?"

Petalfern. The cream colored she cat. Why did _Reedclaw_ want _her_ around? All she ever did was follow him around like a lost kit following a hungry fox! But I couldn't say that. I just couldn't... "U-um, sure." I didn't want her to come along, but I didn't want to lose hunting with Reedclaw either.

"Thanks," Reedclaw purred as he left, his tail up high and proud. He looked so handsome, the way he walked, the way he talked, the way he smiled at me whenever he saw me... I loved everything about him. Did he l-love anything about... me?

"Ivyfall." A voice broke me from my thoughts. Turning around quickly, I spotted the familiar dappled pelt of my best friend, Spottedheart. "Ivyfall, wake up."

"I'm awake," I meowed quickly, shaking my head. "Did you say something?"

Spottedheart purred. "Yes, I was _trying_ to talk to you." Her voice grew more serious. "Ivyfall, I don't think... you should continue to pad after Reedclaw."

"What?" I growled, shocked at what my _best friend_ was telling me. "Why _shouldn't_ I want him? Spottedheart, I _love_ him!" I was just being truthful... I did love him, with all of my heart. I wanted him to be my mate, and decided that I was going to tell him that.

"Ivyfall," Spottedheart whispered. Her eyes were full of pity that made me want to hurl. The next thing she said shocked me, a _lot_. It _had_ to be a lie... "Ivyfall, he's just going to hurt you! I've seen the way... Reedclaw looks at Petalfern. Why do you think he _asked_ if she could come along too? He looks at you like he does any of his _friends_, but the way his eyes follow Petalfern... he likes _her_, Ivyfall."

I didn't know what to say. His eyes followed her around camp? Like the way that I would watch Reedclaw, wanting him, wishing for him to notice me? "Y-you're a liar." I knew that it was true, what she was saying. But I didn't want to admit that.

Spottedheart glared at me. "I'm _not_ lying, Ivyfall. Once you can see that, maybe _then_ you can tell me how wrong you were!"

Spottedheart whipped around and stalked off, her tail swishing in anger. I watched her leave. I watched her go, knowing that she was right. She was always right. And since she was right, that would help me later on.

"You're right," I muttered, lying next to Spottedheart in the warrior's den. My eyes were focused on the ginger pelt and the cream pelt that were next to the fresh kill pile. "They _do_ like each other."

"I'm sorry," Spottedheart whispered. "If I could've told Reedclaw that you liked him, a _lot_, before he told Petalfern..."

I rested my tail on my friend's shoulder. I gave Spottedheart a warm smile. "It's not your fault. It's mine. If I would've told him _moons ago_, then this wouldn't be happening. It's not your fault."

Spottedheart closed her eyes. "What're you going to do, Ivyfall?"

She knew that I was up to something. I don't know how she knew, but I could tell that she knew. I smiled. "I'm still going to tell him. I'm going to get him to go hunting with me... He's going to find out... Tomorrow."

"But... what about _her?_" Spottedheart asked. "He's not just going to _leave_ Petalfern when they just wanted to become mates..."

"I know," I whispered, a grin spreading across my face. Tomorrow was going to be a big day for me. Reedclaw would find out about how much I've admired him. He would learn, whether he liked it or not.

"Hey Reedclaw, you want to come hunting with me?" I asked, padding over to the tomcat. Petalfern was talking with the medicine cat at the moment, since her stomach felt bad. Reedclaw's eyes lingered on the herb filled den for a heartbeat before he turned back to me.

"Sure, I could do with some hunting," Reedclaw yawned, getting up and stretching. "Anything to get the fear of sickness out of my mind."

"She'll be fine," I murmured, giving Reedclaw a reassuring look.

Reedclaw nodded and we headed out to hunt. All kinds of things were spinning through my mind at the moment. What will he say? How will he react? What will he _do?_ What will _I_ do? How will this affect... _them?_ Will it? Will Reedclaw just forget that I even _said_ anything to him? I couldn't concentrate on hunting.

After we caught a few things, I stopped Reedclaw in the middle of a clearing. It was far enough away from camp so that no one would hear what we would talk about, but close enough to get all of the prey back without leaving any behind.

"Reedclaw," I meowed, motioning with my tail for him to stop. "There's something that I've been meaning to tell you for a while now."

"What is it, Ivyfall?" Reedclaw asked, concern in his deep blue eyes. He liked me... like a friend.

"I..." I murmured, our eyes meeting. I wondered if he could _see_ the love in my eyes. I wondered if he could _feel_ it radiating off of me. "Reedclaw, I _love_ you. I've loved you for a while now."

Reedclaw looked shocked. "Ivyfall, I-"

"Reedclaw, don't," I whispered, closing my eyes tightly. "I need to tell you this. I _know_ you like Petalfern. I know that you don't like me at all, or, not in _that_ way. We're just friends, and you've never been able to see how I've really felt."

There was silence before Reedclaw spoke. "Ivyfall... I-I never knew..."

I smiled sadly at him. "I know. I should've told you a long time ago."

"I... I-I," Reedclaw meowed, shaking his head. Then he wailed, "I don't know what to do now, Ivyfall!"

"Do?" I asked. "You don't need to _do_ anything. _I_ needed to tell _you_. You don't need to do anything. You need to have a good life. You need to grow old and watch your kits grow up. You need to continue to be my friend."

"What about...?" Reedclaw asked.

"Forget about it," I murmured. "I needed to get this out of my heart. I need to move on. I wish... good times for you and Petalfern, though. We'll always be friends, right?"

"Right," Reedclaw agreed.

And as I watched him turn and walk away, something lifted from my heart. I knew that I would be free from this love that's been tearing me apart. Maybe my mind and heart will work together next time I decide to fall in love... All I knew was this time; our hearts came together, met... then parted, forever.

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**How was that? Review please. Up next: Forgotten Memories.**


	3. Forgotten Memories

**Hey everyone! Thanks for the reviews! And thanks, Kittychow, whose reviews made me remember this story. ^^' Whoops...**

**I don't own Warrriors... still. Will I ever? Probably not.**

**-x-**

Each night it gets worse. Each and every night, I wake up from a nightmare. I can't seem to tell what's real and what's fake anymore. It's all torture... I can't stand it anymore! Each time I go to sleep, I either get the good dreams, or they turn... _deadly_.

"Moonpaw? What's wrong?" My best friend, Crowpaw, asked me. His voice sounded worried. But I couldn't tell him about the dreams. Not yet, not while I'm still scared. Not while I still don't know what they mean.

"Nothing," I murmur, yawning. "Just another bad dream. Nothing to worry about."

"Nothing to worry about?" Crowpaw repeated, confusion and a slight tint of anger mingling in his voice. "Moonpaw, there's _clearly_ something wrong! Why won't you let me help you? I'm here for you, you're my best friend."

I sighed. I couldn't _lie_ to him, but... I wasn't sure yet. I just didn't know. "I... I don't _know_ what the dreams mean, if anything. They're just bothersome. I've never seen anything like them before in my life. Cats that I don't know are there, cats who seem to know _me_, even if I don't know them."

"Some say that dreams are memories," Crowpaw murmured quietly. I looked over at him, tilting my head in confusion. Memories? I don't even _know_ any of these cats!

"I think I just might have a fever or something," I answered, laying back down and closing my eyes again. I didn't want to show him how scared I was. I didn't want to let him see the fear that melted into my bones.

And before I knew it, I was asleep again.

_"Hey! What do you think you're doing?" _

_ Hearing the loud voice, my eyes shot open. I seemed to be floating there, in the air, watching the scene play out before me. There was a silver she cat with dark blue eyes. She looked so much like me... Facing her, his fur ruffled, was a dark gray, almost black, tomcat. I could see anger and hatred in his eyes. I shivered._

_ "I thought you _loved_ me, Smokevine!" The silver she cat spat. I could tell that she wasn't a warrior. She wasn't me, because I was going to be a warrior. This she cat had herb scent all over her, and she didn't have the strength of a warrior in her paws. I could _see_ it._

_ "Love?" The almost black tomcat, Smokevine, growled. "Why would you think that I loved you?"_

_ "I don't know," The silver she cat hissed. "Maybe because you _told_ me you loved me, and then I had your _kit_!"_

_ Kit? But she's a medicine cat! Medicine cats aren't allowed to have kits!_

_ "Moonmask, calm down," Smokevine growled, his claws sinking into the ground. "Or will I have to _make_ you be quiet?"_

_ He bared his teeth and growled at Moonmask. Even her _name_ sounded like mine! So much alike, yet we're so different. Moonmask didn't seem to care that she was facing an opponent who outmatched her in fighting skills, size, muscle and probably speed too. She stood her ground. My heart swelled with a proud feeling for the she cat, and I silently wished her good luck._

_ But then he sprang. I tried to call out, to warn her to duck to the left and slice his flank open, but she couldn't hear me. I couldn't even hear myself, and I knew I called out. All I could do was watch the blood run down her silver pelt like rain as his claws tore into her flesh. Thankfully, it wasn't enough to kill her, and before he could hurt her anymore, many cats came bursting out of the bushes and leapt to her side._

_ "I could've killed you," A ghastly voice whispered, and I gasped in horror as the tomcat that had been hurting Moonmask padded over towards _me_. The entire scene faded, all of the cats disappeared but us two._

_ "But _they_ stopped me," Smokevine growled. His eyes were glowing a dark, blood red. His pelt was ragged and covered in wounds, wounds that would never heal. There were no stars in his pelt, and he stank of fox dung._

_ "But now this time." The whisper was so close; I could've sworn that he was right next to me as he said that._

_ "No!" I screamed, thrashing around, trying to get away from him and away from the darkness. Blood started to fill up the space all around me. Thick, sticky, warm blood. The scent of it choked me. I gasped for breath and let out one final screech. "Help!"_

Suddenly, I was in my nest again. My sides were heaving, and I was gasping for air. Crowpaw was at my side, shoving me, making sure that I didn't fall asleep again. His eyes were wild with fear, mirroring my own dark blue eyes.

"There's something wrong," Crowpaw whispered. His voice sounded like a plea. "Tell me, Moonpaw. I only want to help you. I only want to help."

Help. That was the last thing I had screamed. I needed help. I looked at Crowpaw. He looked shocked, but he looked strong and brave too. Just as Moonmask had been when she faced Smokevine.

"Okay," I whispered. "C-can we leave camp though? Please..."

Crowpaw gave a half smile. "Of course. I'll just tell Bramblepelt that we're leaving." He gave me a gentle lick on the forehead, and I smiled. I was glad to have a friend like Crowpaw.

After he returned, we both headed out into the forest. Thankfully, the sun was rising and it wasn't very dark out at all. I couldn't stand to be in the dark again right now... Once we made it to a small clearing next to a gurgling stream, Crowpaw got me to stop.

"Okay, now what's wrong?" Crowpaw asked.

"You won't make fun of me, or laugh at me because of it?" I asked. I had to make sure, even though I trusted Crowpaw.

"I promise," Crowpaw vowed, nodding his head.

"I think you're right," I meowed. "I think these are memories. I don't think... that they're mine though. I think... that they're from my... past life."

Crowpaw stared at me, and I felt as if I might hurl. He didn't believe me. But before I could run off, Crowpaw meowed, "Continue please."

I nodded. "Okay," I continued. "T-this time, I was watching a scene play out. There were two cats. One was an almost black tomcat, the other a silver she cat."

"Like you," Crowpaw whispered. "And me."

Suddenly I felt a pang of fear. Yes, like him and me. Why hadn't I seen that before?

"It wasn't you!" I meowed quickly, startling him. I repeated that, slower, softer. "It wasn't you. The she cat's name was Moonmask, the tomcat's was Smokevine. Moonmask was asking Smokevine about why he turned against her, and if he loved her or not. Apparently he said he did, and she had his kit... even though she was a medicine cat. Then Smokevine attacked her."

I shuddered, closing my eyes tightly. I felt Crowpaw's tail on my shoulder and his pelt pressed again mine.

"They saved her," I whispered. "Her clan saved her. But then Smokevine came after me... He said he could've killed me, but _they_ stopped him. He said that he was going to now... I think I used to be Moonmask, in a previous life."

"Makes sense," Crowpaw murmured. "In a past life, you probably _would've_ been a medicine cat. I was surprised that you wanted to be a warrior in _this_ life."

"You believe me?" I asked, a little shocked.

Crowpaw nodded. "I can help you through this, Moonpaw. When I woke up, and you were screaming out in fright, pleading for help... I was _scared!_ I don't want to lose you, Moonpaw. Please, I can help you."

I nodded, giving him a little smile. "I know you can."

**-x-**

_"Smokepaw..." I watched, this time through Moonmask's eyes, as her son was brought back to camp. "Smokepaw!"_

_ Grief welled up in my heart. Not Smokepaw... no, why did he have to die? It wasn't fair! Why couldn't it have been Smokevine, his evil father, instead? I raced over to his unmoving body, pressing my nose into his cold, wet fur._

_ "Why did it have to be you?" I whispered, pain breaking apart my heart. I didn't even know this cat, but _Moonmask_ did... and all of her emotion went through me as if it were mine. "Why, my son... why?"_

_ Suddenly the scene changed. I gasped, seeing the lump of fur in front of me. I recognized it. It was my mentor, Fallingheart. Her ginger pelt was bright against the dark background. I knew from the moment I laid my eyes on her that she was dead._

_ "Not again," I whispered, new grief rising in my throat. "Not another one... not everyone close to me..."_

I woke up, shuddering with tears burning my eyes. But I knew as I saw Crowpaw's sleeping form next to me that it would all be okay, and I pressed myself against him.

"Thank you," I purred quietly as I let myself drift back off to sleep. "Crowpaw..."

**-x-**

**So, how was that? The characters Moonpaw/mask, Smokepaw, Smokevine and Fallingheart are all from my story "Words From The Stars, The Heart of a Warrior". So, to understand... yeah. I wanted to explore Moonmask's character a little more, so... I reincarnated her, making her have to remember all of the bad memories (along with the good ones).**

**Up next: No Light. (Warning: The next fwe prompts might be a little... dark. Maybe? The last one will be light-hearted, I know that!)**

**Review please?**


	4. No Light

**Hey, this is the last time that can update in, like, 12 days. ROADTRIP! Yeah, that's where I'll be, without any wifi. Have fun with this dark chapter. Of, I might want to warn you, these next couple of prompts... I see them as very dark. Just a warning.**

**-x-**

I was scared, I was hurt. I was bleeding out, every day of my life, but _everyone_ failed to notice. No one could look past their happy fantasy to see the pain I was in. Nobody even _cared_ that I was in this pain. Not a single cat who I thought was close to me even bothered to ask me if I was okay. _She_ saw my pain, I could feel it. _She_ saw how much it hurt me, every day. But _she_ did nothing about it!

I was breathing heavily now, rocking soothingly back and forth. I wanted my brain to just shut down. I wanted to stop thinking. If I could stop thinking, I could escape the pain. I just had to stop thinking.

_It's all her fault!_ A voice inside my head insisted. _It's her fault you're in pain. Everything that's gone wrong in your life so far has been her fault!_

"No!" I yowled, biting down hard on thin air. I couldn't let anyone hear me. No one could know, not now, not ever. Then I continued, quieter. "It wasn't her fault. She was just looking after me. She wanted me to have the best life I could... She's always cared."

Want to know who I'm talking about? My mother. Moonmask. Why would I be so mad at my mother? She brought me into this world. But that wasn't what I grew up believing.

I grew up for many moons of my life believing that my mother was a cat named Sandtail, Moonmask's sister. No one would've guessed that Moonmask was actually my mother, since she was a _medicine cat!_

She was a medicine cat. That tore into my heart. That made me bitter. I wasn't supposed to be born; I wasn't supposed to be here. I was an accident. I was a _nothing_, the son of a medicine cat. I was nothing.

_It is Moonmask's fault,_ the voice insisted. _She gave birth to you. She _abandoned_ you._

"She did," I whispered. I could feel the tears stinging at my eyes. Hot, salty tears. My heart was already shattered, so breaking it some more didn't really matter. My mind hurt, and I softly bit down on my paw. Tasting the salty tang of blood, I could feel the pain in my mind grow weaker. My head wasn't splitting apart anymore, and it felt at peace.

I grew up thinking that Thornheart was my father. Again, I was wrong. Thornheart was Sandtail's mate, which meant he was _not_ my father. He was a great warrior, and I've always admired him. I wish he could've been my father... No, _yesterday_ I met my real father. I was in a battle on the border with CliffClan. I was in a fight, and a tomcat brought me off to the side where no one could hear us.

"Smokepaw, I'm your father," he told me. "You have to trust me, my son. I don't want to see you hurt, not by my kin, _your_ kin."

I trusted him. Something about him told me he was telling the truth. I felt closer to those cats from CliffClan. They weren't my enemies anymore. They were my _kin_, my family. But they didn't know that.

My mother, my own mother, seemed to abandon me. Just as the voice told me. She left me with her sister, and I could tell by the way I treated my cousins that my mother's sister didn't like me as much as she loved them. No, if I was mean to them, or rude to anyone, she would show me that she loves them more. And I hated that.

I was never loved. If Moonmask thought that she loved me, she was wrong. I bet she could've _guessed_ where I'm going right now...

"I need to do this," I whispered, my paws sliding over the smooth rocks and stones. The river that had once run through this little valley left all of the stones smooth. They felt good underpaw, unlike those sharp pine needles that sometimes showed up in our territory.

I let out an annoyed growl as I stepped on a sharp, shiny piece of something. Twolegs... they never think, they just throw their things wherever and don't even care if it hurts others. I licked my paw, tasting the slight tangy taste of blood once again. Whatever I stepped on, _StarClan it hurt!_

Ignoring the pain, I continued on my way. But it wasn't long before my mind spoke up some more.

_Are you just going to let Moonmask get away with all that she did to you? Don't you want any kind of revenge? Aren't you going to hurt her, kill her, _something_? She ruined your life, yet you pretend like she did nothing!_ The voice in my head shouted, bringing back the head-throbbing pain. I clenched my jaws just to keep from yowling in pain. That voice was sheer agony.

"I'm going to hurt her," I spat to no one in particular. "I'm going to hurt her so much. I've noticed the way she looks at me, like she actually _cares_ about me! I've _seen_ it! And I'm going to hurt her. Cats like Thornheart shouldn't have to get hurt too... it wasn't his fault... but he's going to end up just like the rest of them."

_Well? Hurt them! Go back to camp and _kill_ that traitor! Kill her!_ The voice screamed.

I groaned. Pain was my enemy. I hated it, yet it kept coming back again and again and _again_... All I wanted was for it to stop...

"Stop it," I groaned, stopping in my tracks. I swayed on my paws, feeling like I was going to fall down. The nice cool breeze kept me awake, even in this broken state.

_They never saw the blood. They never saw the blood that ran from your heart. Every _heartbeat_ is a battle for you!_ The voice insisted.

"Shut _up!_" I screamed, unable to take it anymore. Every time I heard that voice, something inside my head felt like it was ripping apart. And no matter how much I tried, I couldn't keep my head together. And what was worse was that it was putting these thoughts into my head... these _dark_ thoughts... I shivered. It _scared_ me, sometimes, the things I would think about. I _scared_ myself.

"I'm a monster," I muttered as I continued on my way. The stars weren't out tonight, since the sky was covered with clouds. StarClan wouldn't be able to see what I was doing. They would never know. They would never find out. I would go somewhere else, far away from StarClan, where they couldn't see me anymore...

_Moonmask is a monster. Sandtail is a monster. Smokevine actually _cared_ about you..._ The voice whispered.

"No," I growled, tears springing to my eyes from the pain. The unbearable pain... "No. Moonmask cared for me. She gave me a home."

_She abandoned you._

"She loved me!"

_She left you._

"She still cared..."

_Has she ever told you she loves you?_

I wanted to cry, right then and there. No, she had never even told me that she loved me before. She _couldn't!_ Either she never felt it was important enough, or she never _did_ care about me. She just handed me off to someone else when she didn't want me herself.

"I don't care what you say," I growled.

Pausing, I looked around. I made it. I was right where I wanted to be. I felt the cold grass brushing against my paws. It was soft and cool, with icy dirt underneath it. If I sunk my claws into the ground far enough, I could feel it.

I looked over the edge. I was right next to the river. Swirling currents wisped around, gurgling and washing down the endless river. _Perfect_. No one would find me here. No one would ever think of searching for me here.

_Don't tell me you're going to..._

"I'm going to cause her pain," I whispered, looking to my destiny. _This_ was where my life was leading to. My life had no light. Before I could hear that awful, mind clouding voice again, I jumped.

**-x-**

**How was that? Dark? I know. Smokepaw was from "Words From The Stars; The Heart of a Warrior", and I'm pretty sure that he did end up commiting suicide, if I remember correctly. It's been forever since I finished that story, so... Review please?**

**Up Next: Alone**


	5. Alone

**Hello my readers! Sorry for the really late update, but I've been away for a while, and I've had some school projects. But I'm back from my ten day road trip, I've finished ALL of my projects, got them all turned in, and now I can focus more time on my fan fictions. Well, other than the time that I'll be spending with my grandparents (my mom is making a huge plan of being somewhere like every single day)...**

**But I'll still be updating! I don't own Warriors... Though I do wish the Erins would work more on Warriors than their other series (Seekers, and soon, Survivors).**

Alone

I could hear the crashing of the branches and bushes before _they_ even arrived at the camp. My mother, Harefur, always told me about the creatures that were coming towards our camp at this very moment. Harefur told me that they were savage, merciless. She told me that they would kill us all if they wanted to. But she told me something worse... sometimes they might leave you. Sometimes, they leave you to die, all alone. That's what scared me the most.

_"Dogs!"_

The fierce yowl of our deputy, Nightwhisker, set the camp ablaze with screeching cats, all wanting to escape from the camp before the dogs reached the camp. No one seemed to notice each other anymore in the mad dash to save your own life. No one cared for the weak, except for the few brave ones left.

"Come now, hurry!" Harefur called, her voice desperate. I blinked, not thinking that any of this was real. How could it be? One moment I was peacefully sleeping next to my mother and littermates, and the next everyone was scared.

I watched as she nosed Rosekit, my ginger furred sister, to her paws. Rosekit complained a little, since she was _really_ tired, but she still followed Harefur. Owlkit, my rambunctious ginger and white furred brother, leaped to his paws, eager to follow her too.

But why did we have to leave? We were surrounded by brambles and bracken. The dogs wouldn't be stupid enough to break through it. They would hurt themselves a _lot_. We were safe as long as we stayed here, right? I mewled a little as she brought me to my paws.

"But _Mommy_, I don't want to leave," I protested. "Aren't we safe?"

We were always told that the clan was safe. That's why we lived here, because it was safe and we looked out for one another. One day, I would be a warrior, and _I_ would be the one looking out for the other cats in my clan. One day, that would be _me_ who would be leading the clan, making the decisions. That would be _me_ one day.

"We're _not_ safe right here," Harefur meowed. She sounded _scared_, and that scared me more than anything else right now. Even more than being alone. If _Harefur_ was scared, everyone should be.

She licked my fur the wrong way, knowing that that would make me get up. I growled a little and stumbled to my paws. Owlkit, Rosekit and I were ready, and Harefur grabbed Littlekit before we left. She was so small, our medicine cat, Kestralwing, didn't think that she'd live. But she was living, right now at least.

"Harefur!" I heard the worried voice of my father, Wolfclaw. Wolfclaw was standing at the entrance, his eyes wild. He raced to her side and grabbed Rosekit in his jaws. "We're _leaving_."

"I'll help!" Wolfclaw's sister, Ivyfeather, was at his side. She grabbed Owlkit, even though he was the biggest of us four. "Where do ya' want me to take 'im?"

"The leader's den is above everyone else's'," Harefur meowed, her eyes darting over to me. I could tell that she didn't want to leave me, but she knew that she would have to.

"Lightkit," Harefur whispered, her eyes wild with fear and pain from having to leave me, "Stay here. Get in the back of the den. Don't move, and _don't_ make a sound. Do you hear me?"

I nodded, and raced away. But then I stopped and watched them leave. I couldn't just run and hide, I wanted to see what was _happening!_ I would never get another chance like this in my life, and I wanted to see a dog. What was so scary about them? So I went back to the nursery entrance, just as the first broke into camp.

The camp exploded with growls, hisses, and a loud barking noise. The lithe shapes of frightened cats ran screeching all around the camp as the _huge_, dark shapes of the dogs followed them. Fear stabbed into my heart when I saw how _huge_ the dogs were, how sharp their teeth were...

"StarClan, _no_," I gasped, shrinking away from the entrance.

Everything seems to happen at once, but it all takes forever to stop. I hear the agonized yowls of cats in my clan as the dogs sharp teeth connected with their backs or tail or any other part of them.

"StarClan, make this stop," I whispered, not wanting to see any more of this slaughter.

The scent of blood hung in the camp, and all I seemed to be able to see anymore was dark scarlet. It covered the ground, it covered the dogs, it covered the cats, it covered _everything_.

A shape broke into the nursery, and I let out a frightened screech. Harefur told me not to make a noise, but the fear spoke for itself. Fear flooded from me, though, as I recognized Ivyfeather at the entrance.

"Get yerself back _now!_" Ivyfeather screeched. "Hide, ya' hear me?!"

I didn't nod, I didn't answer. All I did was stand in fear, staring at the dark shape that appeared behind her light gray pelt. I tried to choke out a warning to her, but it was too late. Golden yellow teeth met Ivyfeather's back. She hissed and yowled in terror, but that only lasted for a second. Scarlet poured from her, and the dog dropped her to the ground with a sickening _thud!_ The dog left, and I raced to Ivyfeather's side.

Her eyes were open wide in terror, but they were hazed over and sightless. Death was the first thing that came to mind. That dog had killed her. Ivyfeather was gone. She was never coming back. And it was all _my_ fault. _I_ didn't warn her, _I_ was the one she came back for; _I_ was the one who had killed her.

My tail crossed her eyes, closing them. I couldn't stand to have her sightless stare forever glaring at me, blaming me for her death, the death I had caused...

"Lightkit, where are you?" The gentle voice of my mother rang through my ears.

My head swiveled, and I ran to her side. I buried my nose in her fur, crying, "It's all my fault, it's all my fault!" Harefur just licked at the fur on my head, trying to calm me down.

"Time to go, Lightkit," Harefur whispered and grabbed me by the scruff on my neck. She then dragged me out of the nursery and carried me out across the battlefield.

There were cats everywhere, laying, dying. Most were either dead or dying, with blood covering the ground. A few cats were still trying to get away, somewhere, anywhere. I looked around with fright, trying to find Wolfclaw and my littermates. But I couldn't see any of them. The leader's den caught my eye, and I saw the dark gray shape of Wolfclaw in from of it. He was fighting, but he looked tired and beaten.

Before we were able to get to the leader's den, a dog grabbed a hold of Harefur. She dropped me to the ground with a screech as the big brown brute grabbed her tail and yanked her backwards.

"Mommy!" I screamed as I watched it tear at her fur and rip apart her life.

No, not her! Anyone but her! I couldn't lose my mother, I just couldn't! Apparently Wolfclaw heard me, because he raced over and attacked the dog. He fought like all of TigerClan to protect her, but I think he knew it was already too late. The dog had dropped her, but she didn't move at all. Her body didn't twitch, her chest didn't rise or fall, and her eyes were open. Just like Ivyfeather.

"Get to the den," Wolfclaw hissed, swiping at a dog that was coming towards us. He let out a fearsome yowl, mixing in all of his anger, pain, rage and grief as he tore into that dog's fur.

I scrambled away, towards the leader's den. But the sight of a dog making its way into the den stopped me. No, my littermates were in there! I didn't want to lose them too, but there was nothing I could do. It was already in the den, and I don't think that it was coming back out anytime soon. I could hear wails of pain, which made me want to lie down and die right there.

"Get away, kit!" The gruff voice of one of our clan's warriors, Brambleblaze, said from behind me. I turned to him, staring with eyes wide. His fur was soaked with blood, and there were cuts and scratches covering his pelt. He looked like he was dead, if he wasn't still walking. He gave me a rough shove before diving back into the battle.

I stumbled backwards and found myself falling through thin air. I didn't have the strength to let out a wail, so I just waited. I didn't have to wait long before I hit the ground. But there wasn't as much pain as I was expecting. I found myself in a bed of moss, hidden away in the medicine cat's den.

Mommy! Daddy! Rosekit, Owlkit, Littlekit! I couldn't leave them alone! But the pain in my legs wouldn't let me stand, and as I tried again, I found myself drifting off into the darkness.

-x-

When I came to, all I could see was darkness. But as I let my eyes focus, I could see a faint light coming from outside the den. Where was Harefur? And my littermates? Were they already out playing? I noticed that I was in the medicine cat's den. How'd I get here? Was I sick? That would explain the nightmare I had last night...

I got to my paws, padding over for the den's entrance. But nothing could've prepared me for what I saw. Every inch of the clearing was coated in blood. It pooled around the cracks and stained the rocks.

"No," I gasped, not wanting to believe what I seeing. This couldn't be true. This wasn't possible. No, this wasn't _happening!_ It couldn't be! It was just a dream, not actually real! W-why? Why did it have to be real?

I found myself wandering around what remained of the dead cats. There were bodies everywhere, and my heart and mind split in two when I found some that were close to me. Harefur still lay where she had been before, but Wolfclaw was next to her. He had his paw covering hers, as if making a promise to her. _I promise... I'll see you soon._ I didn't want to know if that was really his promise or not.

I had to get away from this. Running past the twisted and broken body of Brambleblaze, I raced past the leader's den. But something caught my eye, something stopped me. A noise, faint, but still a noise.

I raced into the den, dreading what I'd find. Lying in front of me were the mangled bodies of Rosekit and Owlkit. I felt so utterly alone it _ached_. But then I saw Littlekit... his flank still moved.

"I'm not alone," I told myself. "I'm not alone!"

I was crying now as I raced to his side. But once I got there, I wished I hadn't. There was a big slash across his flank, but he was still breathing... for the moment.

"L-Lightkit...?" Littlekit's mew was hoarse, and he coughed and sputtered on his own blood as he tried to speak.

"Shush," I whispered, tears blurring my vision. I didn't want my littlest brother to suffer any more than he had to. "Don't try to speak. Everything's going to be okay, Littlekit. You'll see. Poppyleaf's going to patch you up and make you all better. Don't worry."

"P-Poppyleaf's... d-d-dead," Littlekit coughed. I stared at him as if he was barking instead of meowing. I got to my paws, wanting to see if he was right. But a coughing wail kept me from leaving.

"P-please stay..." Littlekit choked out. Each breath was painful for him, I could tell. The pain shone brightly in his eyes, brighter than any star I had ever seen. "I... d-don't want... to g-go... alone."

Alone. I couldn't leave him to die alone. I sat down at my brother's side, licking the fur clean around his wound. "I'll never leave you," I whispered between licks. "You're my brother, Littlekit. Not long from now, you won't feel this pain anymore. Owlkit and Rosekit, Harefur and Wolfclaw, they'll all look after you. Don't worry; you'll be at peace my brother."

I swear, he flashed me a goofy smile. He was dying, yet he still wanted to brighten the mood. Tears landed onto his scarlet stained pelt.

"I... l-love you... Lightkit," Littlekit whispered, drawing in a big breath. As he let it out, I knew that it was his last. It sounded peaceful, calm, and painless. His last breath to end his suffering. Silently, I envied him. He would never be alone anymore. However, that was different with me. I was alone. Completely alone now.

I got to my paws and dragged myself out of the leader's den. The sun was coming up, making the pools of blood glow an even brighter scarlet. I could see my reflection in one of them. One cat. I wouldn't ever make it more than a few days. Alone. Lightkit, the survivor. But not for long, I prayed. Not for much longer. I looked to the dawn sky. A promise held in that sky, a promise of peace. A promise of life. A promise... for me to make. A promise for _me_ to stay alive.

"I promise," I vowed, hanging my head before lifting it to the sky. "As long as I won't be alone anymore... I promise..." Tears blurred the sky into a group of watery colors. "I promise... I promise!"

**Okay, greusome. These next few might get a little dark, still being warned.**

**Up next: Silenced. (_Sooo_ not a dark theme...)**


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